Saturday, February 21, 2009

Chapter Over

I did it today. I coached Bubba for the very last time. It just dawned on me and I am very sad. I started out making a totally different post and it hit me. It's over! I'll never coach him again. I can't believe that chapter of our life is over. My boy is growing up and I hate it. I know he has to but it makes me very very sad. He's my baby! I knew that it was going to be hard but I didn't know it was going to hit me like this. I'm a blubbering mess!

I have coached that sweet boy since he very first started. Basketball, spring baseball, fall ball, we've done it all. He and I, we've been a great team over the years. There have been times that I have wanted to quit but when those big beautiful eyes of his would beg me to continue I just couldn't say no. It's been hard. Not an easy road at all. Kids sports get very competitive and there's lots of drama. Men make it hard too. Most of them don't like the competition of a woman coach. They just made me that much more determined. They made me strive to be a better coach, a better mom.

We've had good times and bad times. Winning seasons and losing seasons. Sometimes it was fun and sometimes it wasn't fun at all. No matter what, we were a team, he and I. He's an extremely awesome kid and he has taught me so much. We have learned things together. We have created memories that will last a lifetime. Memories that not all parents get to share with their kids. All-star tournaments and Championship games, it's been so much fun! I am so proud of my boy and I am really going to miss coaching him. It may seem silly to some, but to me, it was something really special. Bubba and I have a really special bond and sports has been a big part of our lives. I'm going to miss so much about it but most of all, I'll miss the time we spend together. Now he'll spend that time with another coach, another mentor. I know he has to grow up and he has to learn from others but I'm not ready. I thought I was but I'm not. I've said it before and I'll say it again, Damn this parenting stuff is HARD. It really tears at your heartstrings.

He's a big boy now and tomorrow he will get his first phone call from his new coach. He'll be on a team with a new group of boys, a new group of coaches, and a new set of rules. I know he'll be fine but it's hard knowing that I have no control. I just pray that he gets a good coach that will teach him something and be fair. It's all I can ask for. He's a great ball player and I know he'll do fine! I'll start this season in the stands, a place I've never been before. It's going to be a different ride that's for sure.

1 comment:

girl said...

I say congratulations to you! Congrats for making all those boys awesome! I hope he has an awesome season this year and you get new and wonderful memories.