Thursday, January 29, 2009

Not sure what to do

I got a very unexpected phone call tonight. It was from my little sister. She lives in the town where my ex lives and all of his relatives. She and I don't get along very well and only talk a couple of times a year. So, when she called tonight I was a little shocked and waiting to hear what she wanted this time. It seems that the only time she calls is when she wants something.

Once she got past the small talk she says, "I need a really really big favor." She tells me that my ex's mother is dying. She has been diagnosed with brain/lung cancer like my mother had. They are giving her two weeks to live and she wants to see Bubba before she dies. First of all, that is not my choice to make. Bubba is old enough to make those kind of decisions on his own. He's a smart boy! So, I told her to give me a call back tomorrow and I will let her know.

Part of me doesn't even want to mention it to him. I know I have to and it is ultimately his choice but why now? She never cared about him when the ex and I were married. She never had anything to do with him, didn't even come to the baby shower or his first birthday. She's never been to any birthday of his as far as that goes. She hasn't seen him in well over six years. Never once has she sent him a birthday card, a Christmas card, or anything to let him know that she cares that he exists. Why should I even bother worrying him with this? Would it be wrong for me to just not tell him? I am almost certain that he will not want to go see her but he has such a big heart he may just want to grant her this one wish. I am so torn as to what to do. This parenting stuff just gets harder and harder!


Michelle Lynn said...

O wow, that's a toughie. But far as I can tell you've always made the right choice where this stuff is concerned. And your boy is smart. He'll know what he wants to do.

Steph said...

I would at least give him the option. My biological grandfather passed away years ago and my biological father was asked to come and say goodbye. He says it was a good thing. They made peace. She may feel really terrible for her behavior now that she's dying and want to make peace. He'll make the right decision for him

Amy said...

I tagged you in a photo challenge.